+ and when the heart is set for eternity . .

> Monday, January 17, 2005 <

+ heartache.

was gonna add this in diana's gbk, but i think it's abit too sensitive..

+ diana dear, i feel the same way abt daph and that guy.. and i think yj, cheryl and i feel the same way abt chris, cos it's somewhat similar, just that u don't have actual proof that he'll be like that, u just think he won't accept u as a potential gf.. sigh.

don't want to see diana counting calories and eating the amount of food an ant eats, desperately wanting to run/dance/do crunches everywhere/refusing to sit down when playing mahjong, partially cos of him. i'm not sure to what extent it's cos of chris, but she did say that she doesn't think she has a chance with chris.. unless she loses weight. sigh. =(

but well. as i always believed, love hurts. if it doesn't hurt, it isn't love.

in the mrt yday, i had the familiar yet still strange ache inside. it's just a dull pain that doesn't go away, and gets me down. i want him to hold me and tell me everything will be ok, to somehow remove the ache, but yet, being so close to him makes the ache stronger. it's the same kind of feeling that i used to remove by doing things to myself physically. i want to rebel against this feeling, by scrawling all over my arms, letting out blood, or do something permanent. anything to distract myself from it.

at 5:03 PM * 0 hearts dreamt

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