+ and when the heart is set for eternity . .

> Friday, December 24, 2004 <

+ rollercoaster day

combined bday today! will blog more the next time.. not really in the mood (and no more energy) to talk abt it (and give it the due attention it deserves =)..

my happiness meter had a field day today.. ecstatic over the present, plunging when we had to wait around so much and eric bein mean =( , high just before dinner, taking a nosedive again during dinner (think alcohol really makes me tired and depressed), hit rock bottom right after dinner, shooting up when taking photos, and got a bit higher after talkin to eric just now.. the later plunges were cos of a certain someone i can't get out of my system.. i really have no idea what i feel abt him, whether i still love him, why i cried.. i think i just felt so guilty and sad that i was so heartless to him, and it was such a waste that our r/s could not maintain on love alone.. breaking up is painful and bitter, no matter how much i hate him (which i don't).. so embarrassing to cry. sigh.

then the last rise in happiness today was cos.. he admitted that he likes me.. ok i thought he did, then i got really confused with all the signals i was getting, and then i thought that he didn't, but now.. well. yeah. he just admitted that he did.. =) not sure what to do abt it though.. and yeah that useless pig just went straight to sleep right after admitting!! -_-'' he's really taking it easy..

guess i'll head for the bed soon.. everyone's asleep but me.. =) just confused , i guess..

at 5:00 AM * 0 hearts dreamt

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